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Iida Tuesday October 4

This weekend I went to Iida to see Naomi. I saw Naomi, but it ended up being a lot more than that. Everyone in Naomi's family save her mother seemed to think at first that I was her boyfriend. After the first dinner, I cleared all that up; I also cleared up the fact that I could hold my own in Japanese, and that talking about whether or not I was Naomi's boyfriend in front of me was probably not a good idea.

I say that it "ended up being a lot more than that". What I mean is that the reason Naomi herself went to Iida all the way from LA is that her grandfather died two years ago, and it was time for the yearly ceremony to remember him. In the Buddhist tradition, it's called a houji. I had figured that I would simply walk around the town and explore during those times as not to get in the way, but after I arrived I quickly discovered that I was to be included in the ceremony.

I think this is because everyone thought that I was Naomi's boyfriend. Regardless, in the end, it all worked out. Those of you who may know Naomi probably can understand why some think that we date; we are close, and we have been for almost five years. In Japan, moreso than in the States, it's not as common for a guy to have such close female friends he is not dating.

Anyway, I could go into detail about what the houji was like, but I think that it's better left unsaid unless someone is specifically curious. What I was looking at -- from the anthropological standpoint -- is not what the ceremony was, but why it was important to these people. How can I connect these needs and wants to the needs and wants of people I know well, Americans?

How can I start to understand the world as a whole unit that is full of people who just happen to live in different places with the same needs, and thus have different methods of attaining those needs?

That is ultimately what I seek to understand, and that is a large reason I am interested in Japan. It is a strange mixture of the East and the West, and at the same time, often unique. By observing how people in these circumstances create, desire, and fulfill their own needs, I can hopefully better understand how people, in general, do the same.

It was great to see Naomi, but admittedly strange to put one of my close friends in the middle of a Japanese family. Something I had never really thought of...